Global Atlantic Fellows Annual Convening: The Power of Turning Up

Te Awa Puketapu, 2022 Fellow

‘Step In (to challenging conversations), Step Up (to make change)’ was the theme for last month’s Global Atlantic Fellows Annual Convening at Rhodes House, Oxford. The convening was an opportunity to meet with Global Atlantic Fellows from other international Atlantic programs, we compared programs, work, countries and lives. Reflecting on the convening, I see the power, not only of stepping in and stepping up, but of turning up.

This was the beginning of my own insights of ‘rituals of encounter’ – how we practice and hold conversations, how we ‘turn up’ in those conversations and how we consider opportunities to connect and collaborate.

AFSE 2022 Fellows meeting at Rhodes House

To use a phrase from Aboriginal whānau (family); I’d travelled from Aotearoa under the shadow of ‘Sorry Business’ with the feelings and rituals that we have and hold during loss running very deep. Participating in this convening put on pause the physical process of grieving, whilst I still carried the spiritual and emotional parts. This state of being impacted my personal purpose and the outcomes sought from this convening.

Reconnecting with the 2022 AFSE cohort at St Anne’s College prior to the official opening, and visiting the Pitt Rivers Museum at the Oxford University Natural History Museum, we participated in a ritual of encounter more familiar to us, a Mihi Whakatau (a Māori welcome), completed by the Atlantic Institute’s Executive Director Evie O’Brien. This process facilitated connection with Māori people who occupied this space, such as Evie and the late Mākereti Papakura who lays in the lands of Oxford. It also provided an opportunity to re-connect with each other under a cloak of protection as we occupied the lands and the spaces within the museum, and over the course of the convening, encouraging us to be present, open and courageous.

I quickly realised that courage was needed to be present in the museum, both in that moment, and on our return that evening for dinner and a meet and greet. Words such as stolen, acquired, lame, grief, loss, dislocation, disrespect, yearning, repatriation, urgent, lost and whiteness, come to mind when attempting to describe the feelings conjured during these visits. There’s a lot of work to be done and I was left asking myself: “When faced with situations that invoke all your feelings, what is my own process of dealing with this, to then have an outcome that positively impacts on others?”

Again, the rituals of encounter needed to be remembered, and the motto ‘Step In, Step Up’, whilst being present in the ‘foreignness’ and being confronted and surrounded by ‘collections’ from my peoples, of my people, from my land, alongside many other peoples, and their lands…

Rhodes House and the University of Oxford at large were a truly confronting contradiction to be present in, and this contradiction seeped into the ‘ways of life’ beyond the walls of the University.

I saw photos of ‘greats’ who studied here, in a house adorned from profits made from colonial exploitation, while also sharing this experience alongside hundreds of people that carry their own experiences and histories of colonial impact. Being connected through the centring of our people and focus on re-balancing equity was much more worthy of focus and discussion, in the house of, and on the lands of colonial imperialism. The irony of being in the ‘master’s house’ discussing and planning de-colonialism, re-balancing inequities and figuring out what ‘would rise’ in the face of Rhodes falling, crossed my mind many times.

Te Awa with AFSE Fellows Jewelz Petley and Sarah Morris at Rhodes House

Hearing presentations from incredibly exciting and powerful people working in various areas was an extremely important way to start this convening. During this ritual of encounter, we heard from Fellows involved in brain health, rural, Indigenous, sexual and reproductive health, as well as Fellows from the Racial Equity and Social and Economic Equity programs - understanding ‘Black consciousness’ and ‘transnational solidarity’ and discussing the idea that inequality is not inevitable were highlights here. These presentations offered a tangible connection to a community of people, where I could place myself and begin to compare and contrast experiences and causes of inequities that people and communities around the world are facing. This was a moment where I took my biggest learning of difference – while root causes might be very similar, the variation of impacts (often due to differences in the age and stage of colonialism and imperialism) influence the local community solutions needed in different parts of the world.

Two further key ideas have stuck with me: the problematic nature of the leadership industry and the word ‘leadership’, and that kindness is one of the most under-rated values that we need more of in this world.

Te Awa and with her Global Atlantic Fellows home group out for dinner

The following days of panels and presentations were a lot like how I imagine speed dating would be, you have very little time to choose exactly what you’d like to say and how you should say it, to make the best impact. Building trust and doing your homework on who your audience is proved important here. Many of these discussions were great, some presented challenges both individually and collectively. Words such as privilege, perpetuation, ignorance, excitement, opportunity, knowledgeable, helpful, leaderful, struggle, frustration, platform, airwaves and why, come to the foreground when attempting to describe reactions to the different speakers over these two days.

The rituals of encounters, not just with each other, but with our own selves, was being tested more and more.

Dinner at the Oxford Town Hall

I left the convening reminded about many things, but most important was knowing I had a huge family at home watching this experience and relying on me to turn up as my true authentic self, regardless of ‘Sorry Business’, and continue searching for the purpose and learning in all challenges. There are so many opportunities ahead for our community as we continue to work apart but together in our parts of the world, making connections, developing long-lasting relationships, and striving to achieve that one golden thread of re-balancing equities.